As I contemplate the gifts that COVID has brought I am reminded that there are things that these COVID times have taken away as well. While painful, I see that the things that are leaving me are also a blessing. To be specific there are things, events, happenings, food and drink and yes even people to which my soul has been tethered. Tethered in an unhealthy way. Leaving my energy leaking out on the ground and in some cases leaving my BEING and transferring to others – a sort of reverse vampire kind of thing if you get my drift.
The gift of time and space that COVID has brought with her has allowed me to finally feel these energy leaks in my body and envision the path to seal them. I could say that these tethers represent my lack of boundaries. Clear boundaries that define who I am and that separate my Being from other people, events, happenings. Sure, these things have come into my life but I don’t have to let them into my Being. Let my very essence flow into them in an attempt to somehow change them to be what I want or think I need them to be. As our Elders have told us, we must name COVID. Why? Because she is part of creation and we must enter into a relationship with her and show our respect and love for her and the lessons she brings. Then and only then can we lovingly ask her to leave us because we have heard her and are ready to heal, change, become our true self. For me her name is Yah teyoyatayen – she has no body. For me that is the lesson she brings in her infinite wisdom. In my tethered living I have not known the edges of my own Being, my own body, and in this way of living I have been unhealthy. Focusing my energy outward on the things I am tethered to, attempting to fix what triggers feelings of un-wholeness rather than putting my energy into becoming the fullness of ME, clearly defined, full to the brim with love’s energy that then overflows to the people, things and events around me. That is the gift of COVID to me. She pushes me to wholeness. Heals my wounds. Enables me to fill with love to overflowing. Nya:wen Yah teyoyatayen. Nyawen’kowa.
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July 2021
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